Chapter 11: Not Mind, Not Buddha, Not Things
All meditations are subtle ways to make you drunk, subtle ways to make you drunkards of the unknown, drunkards of the divine. Then you are no longer there with your conscious mind functioning, then you are not there expecting, then you are not there planning for the future. You are not. And when you are not, suddenly flowers start showering on you, flowers of bliss. Just like Subhuti, empty.you are surprised! You were never expecting, you never knew! You never felt that you ever deserved it; that’s how it is felt - like a grace, because it is not something you have brought on, it is something which has happened.
So one thing: truth cannot be taught, bliss cannot be given to you, ecstasy cannot be purchased in the market. But your mind continuously thinks in terms of getting, purchasing, collecting, finding; your mind never thinks in terms of happening because you cannot control happening - everything else you can control.
I have heard: Once a man became suddenly rich. Of course, when it happened he collected all those things he had always been desiring - a very big house, a big car, swimming pool, this and that. And then he sent his daughter to college. He had always wanted to be educated but he could not be; now he wanted to fulfill all his desires, and whatsoever HE couldn’t do he wanted his children to do. But after a few days the dean of the college wrote a letter to him, and in the letter wrote: “To be frank, we cannot admit your girl to the college because she has no capacity to learn.”
The father said, “Just capacity? Don’t bother! I will purchase the best capacity available in the market for her.”
How can you purchase capacity? But a man who has become suddenly rich thinks only in terms of purchasing. You think in terms of power - power to purchase, power to get something. Remember, truth cannot be got through power; it comes when you are humble. You have nothing to purchase it with, it cannot be purchased. And it is good that it cannot be purchased; otherwise no one would be able to give the cost. It is good that it happens; otherwise how would you purchase it? All that you have is rubbish. Because it cannot be purchased, that’s why sometimes it can happen. It is a gift. It is a sharing of the divine with you - but the divine can share only when you allow. Hence I say you can learn it but it cannot be taught.
In fact in the spiritual world there are only disciples, not masters. Masters are there but they are inactive, passive forces. They cannot do anything, they are just there - like a flower: if nobody comes, the flower will go on spreading its fragrance into emptiness. It cannot help itself. The whole thing is decided by the disciple: how to learn? how to learn from a flower? And a flower shows something but doesn’t say it. It cannot be said. How can the flower say what beauty is? - the flower is beauty. You have to gain, attain, eyes to see, a nose to smell, ears to hear the subtle sound that comes to the flower when the breeze passes by. And you need a heart to feel the throbbing of the flower, because it throbs also - everything alive throbs, the whole existence throbs.