Chapter 31: This Can Become a Transformation
Whenever a woman comes to know that she is accepted as she is, that there is no condition for her acceptance, she becomes beautiful for the first time; a grace of a different world arises in her. Then the beauty is no longer of the body, it is something from the depth, and you can see and feel the glow of it. When she carries an aura of grace, even an ugly woman can become beautiful. Ordinarily even beautiful women are not graceful, because that aura has not come yet.
In the East we have been in deep search for that grace, but in the West, people have still not touched upon it. The eastern and western beauty, and particularly that of a woman, is totally different. In the East we call a woman beautiful if she is graceful. When something beyond the body goes on overflowing and surrounds the body, only then is she beautiful. In the West the physiological is more important than the spiritual.
She is in a deep crisis, and only you can help her to come out of it - so there is a great responsibility on you. It will be very enriching for you both. The whole accident can become a transformation.
I feel I’ve regressed lately. I am less happy now then I was months ago.
It happens, because the mind cannot remain in one state. It changes from positive to negative, and from negative to positive. But wait, and just watch it, because soon the positive will come again, and this time it will be greater than the first time.
But always remember that the negative turn will come again. It is just like day and night following each other. Unless you transcend both, unless you become such a pure witness that you are not bothered by either and become indifferent and unconcerned, these states come and go. And unless that state comes, things will always change - from bad to good, from good to bad. Sometimes you will be flowing and happy, and other times you will feel unhappy and frozen.
This is natural, because mind is a wheel that goes on moving. One spoke comes up, then goes down; another comes up, and then goes down - it goes on moving like a wheel. In India, we represent the word world by the symbol of a wheel. The Indian word for world, sansar, means the wheel. Success is followed by failure, hope by hopelessness, happiness by misery.
One has to understand that this is the natural state of the mind and cannot be changed. The thing is to accept it, and not to get identified with it. When happiness comes, don’t say, “I am happy.” Say, “Happiness has come, I am the watcher.” Remain separate and distant. When unhappiness comes, again do the same. Watch, and note the fact: “Unhappiness has come.” Don’t make any judgments, don’t cling or push it away; rather, just watch.
You will see, by and by, that moods come and go and you remain undisturbed, undistracted. That’s what we call awareness. All else is identification and unawareness. So try this, and it is natural, whatsoever is happening is natural.