Chapter 2: Your Mind Is the Judas
When you know that you are not separate, it is a tremendous realization. Then all fear of losing your face, all fear of losing your personality - which is always slipping - disappears. You have come to the origins. You have come to the eternal, to the universal. This is what I call enlightenment. You have become full of light and clarity. Now you live the whole mystery of existence. Seeing a roseflower, you become it. You don’t see it from outside; you feel it from its innermost being. Its petals are yours, its perfume is yours. You are not an observer - you are it.
Krishnamurti used to say again and again, his whole life he was saying it.. I don’t think the people who were listening were really listening to him. This is his most repeated observation: that the observed becomes the observer, or the observer becomes the observed.
You don’t see a sunset from far away; you are in it, you are part of all those beautiful colors. And to live existence in such deep empathy is the richest experience man is capable of.
Trust your feeling. Never trust your mind - your mind is the Judas.
The more I move into meditation, the more I feel responsible for myself and for the situation in the whole world. How is that possible?
It is the same thing - it is the same question.
The more you become yourself, the more you will feel responsible for the world because you are becoming more a part of the world - you are not separate from it. Your being authentically yourself means a tremendous responsibility - but it is not a burden. It is a rejoicing that you can do something for existence.
Existence has done so much for you, there is no way to pay it back. But we can do something. It will be very small compared to what existence has done for us, but it will show our gratitude. It is not a question of whether it is big or small; the question is that it is our prayer, our gratitude, and our totality is involved in it.
Yes, it will happen: the more you become yourself, the more you will start feeling responsibilities which you had never felt before.
I am reminded:
In the life of Mahavira, the most important Jaina philosopher.. He is going from one village to another village with his close disciple, Goshalak, and this is the question they are discussing. Mahavira is insisting, “Your responsibility towards existence shows how much you have attained to your authentic reality. We cannot see your authentic reality, but we can see your responsibility.”
As they are walking, they come across a small plant. Goshalak is a logician - he pulls the plant and throws it away. It was a small plant with small roots.
Mahavira said, “This is irresponsibility. But you cannot do anything against existence. You can try, but it is going to backfire.”
Goshalak said, “What can existence do to me? I have pulled this plant; now existence cannot bring it to life again.”