Chapter 11: I Am Not Your Father
So this is the whole genealogy of humanity. Each individual is part of this long ugly history. But nothing can be done now; gone is gone. You can forgive, you can feel compassion for all those people. And don’t waste time in finding the roots of your resentment. There are no roots, it is just a conscious thing. It is a parasite.
In India we have a creeper which has no roots. It simply moves from one tree to another tree; it can be miles long. It simply sucks juices from trees. When I was a child and somebody told me that this creeper has no roots, I could not believe it - I am not a type who believes in anything. I went following the creeper deep into the forest, where it had started its pilgrimage of exploitation. Yes, there were no roots. The creeper had small branches coming out, very thin but very strong, like thorns. Those thorns enter into the trees, and from the trees it exploits.
Your resentment has no roots, so don’t waste time. It is a rootless creeper. Your hatred, your anger, all are rootless; they are out of your misunderstanding. They are just in the conscious mind, sucking you, your energy, your intelligence, your silence, your serenity. Just try to understand why it happened. And it is not something that has happened only to you, it has happened to everybody - in that one matter we are all equal. Only in that matter is communism right. So don’t feel that you are the only sufferer.
Becoming alert, conscious, looking at how this resentment has grown.just the very understanding of it will dissolve it.
My father tried his best to make me in his own image; my mother has tried, all those who loved me. I cannot suspect their intentions, their intentions were good. But that is what has been done to them by their parents, and that was all that they could do to me. How can I feel resentful? It was just pure misunderstanding. I feel sad and sorrowful for them because they suffered, their parents suffered, the whole humanity has been suffering unnecessarily.
Just a small revolution will change the whole color of the world. And that small revolution is contained in being free, in being your own self, whatsoever the cost.
My father used to take me to the temple. I resisted, I fought with him, but he said, “You will have to come; otherwise you will fall into hell.” I said, “I would rather fall into hell of my own accord - at least the satisfaction will be there that this is my choice. But you cannot force me into paradise. I will suffer there, badly, because I will not be able to forget that I have been pushed there forcibly, against my will.”
The day I said this to him, for a moment he was silent, and he said, “Then it is okay. Wherever you want to go, you go.”
I said, “I will remain thankful to you for my whole life, because right now I have an appointment to play cards with a few people. You go to your temple, I will go to my appointment. And from this moment there is a possibility of friendship between us.” And from that moment that friendship grew, and a moment came that he became a sannyasin.