Chapter 11: Only a Meditator Can Be a Lover
I have heard you say that the friend will not change a person, but that the enemy will. Another time, I heard you say that love will change both.
Would you please comment on love and enmity? How do they relate to one another? Why do lovers sometimes look like enemies to one another?
Anand Nadam, I have been looking at your questions. It seems your mind is consistently searching for some contradiction in my statements. Perhaps you are not even aware of it. And because you are so preoccupied that you cannot even see when there is no contradiction, you start seeing one just because you want to see it.
It is one of the problems with the mind: whatever it wants to see, it can manage to see it; whether it exists or not is not the point. The mind has a tremendously creative imagination. And once it takes a certain standpoint it goes on finding things which have no existence anywhere, but to the mind they appear absolutely real.
Before I answer your question, you have to be reminded that your being a disciple does not mean that you have to agree with me on anything whatsoever, except meditation. Our relationship is only of meditation and nothing else. I am not proposing a doctrine to which you have to subscribe. Neither am I proposing a religion that you have to become a member of; I am not working to create an organization that you have to be a part of.
You don’t have to agree with me on anything - any of my statements. I am not in search of followers; I don’t have that kind of investment at all. You are absolutely free to agree or disagree, or remain indifferent. Only on one point are you here with me, and the day you feel disagreement on that point you need not be here at all. That point is meditation.
Meditation is not philosophy, it is not theology. It is simply a method of being silent, a method of searching within. If you even disagree on that point, and you say that there is no within and that there is no need to search, that there is no question of going in, I am not at all interested in convincing you. I am not a missionary.
At that point you are absolutely free to go anywhere, to do anything you like with all my blessings, with all my love. Other than meditation, you need not worry about whether I have said something which is not right according to you or according to your knowledge.
For example, you had another question today. A few days before, I had answered a question about why Indian women seem to be so graceful compared with Western women. I had said that the Western woman was just as graceful as the Eastern woman before this century. But in the West, deep research into the science of sex has revealed many new things of which women have been unaware, or perhaps have been kept unaware by man.