Chapter 10: Toward Nothingness
It is just like when a wave moves: in the wake another wave follows it upside-down - that is the wake. It is natural. When there arises a big mountain, a valley follows it. The valley is nothing but the mountain upside-down; it is part of it. When you move, in the wake your shadow, your valley follows. You simply accept it! Mountains are not crying tears about “why do valleys exist?” And neither are waves worried.
The very idea that you have to get rid of the ego is wrong. Drop that very idea. When ego arises, simply note the fact that the shadow is falling - and remember not to get identified with it; remember that you are separate. This is enough. And the true humbleness is born out of this realization.
It is not an effort against the ego that brings humbleness. If you fight the ego, it can bring you a certain type of humbleness - but then there will be another ego arising, and that will be the ego of the humble person, the pious ego: “I am the most humble person in the world. Nobody is humble in comparison to me. I am at the top.” Again the ego has arisen. Ego will always arise whatsoever you do.
Doing brings ego. Ego is the shadow of action. And there is only one thing that is not-doing, and that is awareness, watchfulness. The only thing that is not part of the world of action is pure awareness. No shadow is created by pure awareness. It is so pure that light can pass through it - it is transparent and no shadow is created.
Shadow is created by solid things. The more solid a thing is, the more shadow it creates. Your body creates a shadow; your mind also creates a shadow - the ego is the shadow of the mind. If you become more aware, if you simply watch the mind, its functioning, its mechanism, then you are moving beyond the mind. You become just pure awareness, transparent. Then there is no shadow.
So just laugh at it. And if it tries to seduce you, have a good laugh at your own absurdities. But don’t become a warrior and don’t start fighting with it.
The second question:
You say never to impose yourself on anyone else. Yet you give sannyas to children who can’t possibly make up their minds to take it. You have even given initiation to sleeping babies! What are you doing?
The first thing: I have never yet given sannyas to anybody who was awake - all are sleeping babies! Some are younger, some are older - that is immaterial. What does it matter: a baby of seven months or an old man of seventy years? Sleep is the same.
Yes, I was also puzzled in the beginning when some mother would come with a sleeping baby. Then I pondered over it: Why should I say no? - because that would be unjust to the sleeping baby when I go on giving sannyas to so many sleeping people. So I decided to give sannyas to babies.