Chapter 5: That State Is Awakening
Even modern psychology accepts that only a very small fragment of our totality is conscious, one-tenth, and that too is very fragile, just skin-deep, or not even that deep. Scratch it a little and immediately it disappears. Insult somebody, step on somebody’s toes, and immediately he loses consciousness, he becomes mad. Just a word is enough to make him enraged. Anger is a temporary madness: that fragile part of his being which was just a little conscious - just a little candle - is all dark now.
That’s why many times you say, “I did it in spite of myself.” What do you mean, “in spite of myself”? How can you do anything in spite of yourself? Is there somebody else within you too who can do something in spite of you? When you say it you simply mean, “I became so unconscious, so mad, that I did something which if I had been a little bit sane I would not have even thought about.”
We are living in a so-called waking state; it is somnambulistic. There are people, and they are not few - one person out of every ten persons, ten percent of people who are somnambulists. You may have one in your family! If your family consists of ten persons, probably there is one person who is a somnambulist, who walks in his sleep. There are many people; they may not be aware, their families may not be aware, unless they are caught red-handed, and this rarely happens because everybody is asleep.
In the middle of the night they will wake up, not really awake - their eyes are open but very glassy. If you see their eyes - glassy. But they manage to get out of the door, to reach. the kitchen, to open the fridge, to eat something, go to bed again. And in the morning they complain, “I don’t have any appetite today. I don’t know why I am getting fat!” And they may not be Lying at all, they may be telling it sincerely - that they try to diet and they try to exercise, but somehow they go on gathering fat. They get up in their sleep.
People have been known to do strange things in their sleep - even murders have happened! People have murdered in their sleep, and they were absolutely true when in the court they said, “We don’t know anything about this murder!” Of course every proof is there that they have murdered - their fingerprints are on the person’s neck - still they are right, they are not wrong! A few husbands have killed their wives; they could not gather courage enough in their waking state, but while asleep they managed, gathered their guts. But in the morning they have forgotten all about it.
Papa Bear: “Somebody has eaten my porridge!”
Baby Bear: “Somebody has eaten my porridge too!”
Mama Bear: “Shut up, you idiots! I haven’t served it yet!”
The plane transporting twenty-two inmates from one madhouse to another was flying at three thousand feet. The pilot and the steward were in the cockpit when all of a sudden the plane started tilting to the right, then to the left, then to the right again.
The frightened steward went to see what was happening. One minute later he was back in the cockpit and the plane was back to normal.
“What was the matter?” asked the pilot. “What were they doing?”