Chapter 5: Meditation and the Paths to Inner Awakening
When you become meditative your body will become so sensitive - you cannot conceive now how sensitive the body organs can be. We never hear exactly, we never see exactly - just so-so. You pass through a garden, you seem to be looking but you just look - you do not see. The eyes have become insensitive. You have been fighting with the eyes. The body has become insensitive - you have been fighting the body.
The whole culture is against the body. This whole culture, wherever it is - East or West - it makes no difference. The culture that has developed on this planet is, in a way, diseased. It is against the body and the body is a great mystery. If you go against the body, then in a way you have gone against the universe. It is a miniature universe. Your relationship to the universe, your bridge to the universe, your instruments to the universe, are all through the body. Your body is just a midway station.
So do not fight with the body. Always make a clear distinction in what is the body memory and what is the mind memory. Hunger is the body memory, and you can know it. But the mind also has its own memories. They are not existential - in fact they have no survival value. Body memories have a survival value. And that is the basic distinction: if you deny the body memories - if you fight against them - you will not survive. But psychological memories have no survival value. They are simply waste accumulation - something which is to be thrown away if you have accumulated it, something which needs to be thrown. You have only burdened yourself with it. And these mind memories are long.
Whenever you are in anger there are two possibilities: it may be a body memory, it may be a mind memory. A certain distinction is to be made between them. If your anger has a survival value - if you cannot survive without it - then it has a bodily medium. But if your anger has no survival value, then it is just a habit of the mind. Just a mechanical repetition of the mind - then it is a mind memory. You have been angry so many times that it has become a conditioning with you. Whenever someone just pushes you - just pushes the button - you are angry again. So be aware.
One who is never mentally angry - not habitually angry - his bodily anger will have a beauty of its own. It will never be ugly. Then it will only mean that someone is living, not dead. But the more you are habitually angry, the less will be your capacity to be bodily angry. And your anger will be just ugly. It will not add anything to you - it will just be disturbing to yourself and to others.
We can understand it from another route also, for example: sex. It can be a bodily memory - then it has a survival value. But it can be just cerebral, mental, just out of habit. Then it has no survival value. And one who has become trapped in the habitual pattern, his sex will become an ugly thing. Neither will it have any love, nor will it have any beauty. Neither will it have any music, nor will it have any deeper response. The more cerebral the sex, the less your body will be capable. You will think about it more, and you will not be able to know what it is exactly - what is its deepest mystery. The mind will go on thinking about sex, and the body will have to follow the mind. And whenever the body follows the mind, there is no life in it: it is just dragged along as a dead weight.