Chapter 11: The Alchemy of Chaotic Breathing
It is as if you go home every day, and every day as you reach your house you automatically turn the wheel of the car and find yourself in the porch. You don’t ever have to think about it. But what will happen if one evening as you turn your car to the left, as you do every day, the car turns to the right, and your familiar road disappears, and instead you see an altogether different road? You will suddenly be puzzled and bewildered and find yourself in a strange and incredible state of mind. For the first time you will become fully aware.
Disorientation immediately shakes you out of the rut of unconsciousness; it puts an end to your psychological sleep. Your unconsciousness can never wake up in a world that is well organized and settled, and where everything repeats itself mechanically every day. Your unconsciousness goes when something unexpected, strange and amazing happens, and happens suddenly.
For instance, I am talking to you here. This will not bring you out of the state of unconsciousness. But if suddenly this table starts talking, not even one of you will remain unconscious here. It will be impossible for you to remain unconscious if this table starts speaking. Even a thousand words from me are not enough - you hear them unconsciously. But one word from this table and you all will reach a state of awareness which you have never known before. Why? Because it is strange, it is weird, it is out of the ordinary. It is this disorientation that upsets your inner state and breaks its established patterns of behavior.
So when the experiences of breathing put you in an utterly strange situation, new possibilities of spiritual growth open up before you; you become aware, and then you really see something.
If you can go mad consciously, it will be a great experience; no other experience could be greater than this. But you should be mad and yet remain aware. In the Dynamic Meditation I have devised, a space can be created where you remain fully aware inside, and you go completely mad on the outside. You go so mad that if someone else were in your place you would not hesitate to call him insane. So you can well call yourself insane. But nevertheless you are aware and watching that you are dancing and whirling. So both things happen simultaneously: your being aware and your going mad. And since you are aware, how can you really go mad - even though what is happening to you is the same as happens to a madman?
It is in such a situation that a feeling of utter disorientation overwhelms you, and you separate yourself from the body. Not that you do it, the separation happens on its own. You suddenly find that all connections, all communication between you and the body, have snapped, that all bridges have broken, all accommodations have collapsed. You find that everything relevant has become irrelevant; the everyday relevance of things is lost altogether. Things are happening on their own. Your hands are moving without your wanting to move them. Your eyes are shedding tears without your wanting to cry. You want to stop the laughter, but it continues in spite of you.
The creation of such moments of disorientation is very important for awareness. And they are created faster through breathing than through anything else. Where other techniques take years, breathing does the same in ten minutes. This is because breathing is so deeply connected with our being that even a slight touch to it reverberates throughout our being.