I felt my resistances and defenses being chopped away. The group put me in touch with how I keep myself away from my feelings. I saw that the Tathata group and this one were very much alike; both gave me a new way to be in myself.
Now follow that insight. Sometimes sit and bring it back – otherwise insights can be lost. Sit and bring it back, so that it becomes again a new experience, so that it remains alive and blood goes on circulating in it.
And every method brings you to the same point. The path may be a little different – it starts from a different point – but every method ends in the same center. So, good to understand that. Once you understand that you can use all the methods, you are never dependent on any. By and by one becomes free of methods. One day you will realize that even methods are not needed. Without methods you also reach the same place, but in the beginning it is difficult to reach without them.
Once you have reached the same place again and again through many methods, that place becomes available. There is no distance between you and the space that you have touched – it is just by the corner. Knock and the doors open. It is not far away, but we have forgotten how to knock, and these methods are just how to knock again and again.
I finished the Primal only two days before I did the Enlightenment Intensive. I was feeling very broken down after the Primal, and in the Enlightenment Intensive I felt just destroyed.
Very good. They are opposite experiences in a way.
Primal is very cathartic and the Enlightenment Intensive is very penetrating.
It has been good. In a way, it healed you. The Primal can shatter…it is needed to dismantle the old. In the Enlightenment Intensive a new self is being built. It has been good.
The group was a healing thing…I saw my face in the mirror change and become more alive. In fact to hear my voice, to feel that I am alive, is amazing to me. I don’t know why I didn’t feel I was alive before.