If you allow me, totally, unconditionally, something is going to happen – something of tremendous import, immeasurable…. Even the sky is not the limit for it, because it has no limit. It is tremendous, huge; it is oceanic. But if you don’t allow me, then too, nothing will happen – nothing in the sense that you know the word. If you allow me then nothing will happen in the sense I am using the word. If you don’t allow me, you can take sannyas, you will be in orange – but the same old ego will now be hiding behind orange. Maybe the ego will even become more strengthened.
I have heard…
An organ-grinder appeared beneath Mascagni’s window one morning and began to play the famous “Intermezzo.” He played at such a fast tempo that the composer could not stand it. Rushing to the street, Mascagni seized the handle of the instrument and turned it at the proper speed, explaining to the bewildered organ-grinder that, since he had composed the piece, he wished it to be played correctly.
The next morning, the organ-grinder appeared outside the composer’s house with a huge sign in front of his organ, which read: “Pupil of the Celebrated Mascagni.”
So if you don’t allow me, this will happen: you will have a huge sign – “Pupil of so-and-so, Disciple of so-and-so” – but the sign will only be a new injection of vitality to the dying ego. it depends, because when you take sannyas two persons are involved: I am involved and you are involved. So what will be the outcome depends on us both – me and you. If you allow me, then nothing will happen – nothing in the sense of the vastness out of which everything arises, in the sense of God. If you don’t allow me, then too, nothing will happen – in the sense you know the word. Or, something can even go very wrong: you can become a new egoist – the ego of the sannyasin, the ego of the meditator, the ego of the righteous, the ego of the knower.
So it depends. If you are really going to take sannyas then let it be in my way not in your way, because in your way it only appears that it has happened – it has not happened. It can happen only in my way. In fact, you cannot take sannyas, you can only allow me to give it to you.
Why do I still not trust you?
First, a parable: meditate over it. It will reveal mysteries to you about how the mechanism of mind functions.
There is a story that when the great library of Alexandria was burned, one book was saved. But it was not a valuable book, and so a poor man, who could read a little, bought it for a few coppers. It was not very interesting, yet there was a most interesting thing in it. It was a thin strip of vellum on which was written the secret of the “touchstone.”