The more things accumulate, the more life is wasted because they have to be purchased at the cost of life. You are less alive, death has come near, things are growing more and more, the pile goes on becoming bigger and bigger, and inside you are shrinking. Then comes the fear: “What am I achieving, where am I reaching? What have I done with my whole life?”
And you cannot go back, the time that is wasted cannot be returned to you, there is no way. You cannot get it back, you cannot say, “Sorry, I will start again”; that is not possible. Then by the time you become old you become more and more sad. That sadness is not because of physical age, that sadness is because now you realize what you have done to yourself: you have made a house, of course you have succeeded, you are rich. You have attained prestige in the eyes of others, but what about in your own eyes?
Now you feel the pain, the suffering of a wasted life, of time lost. Death is coming nearer and soon you will dissolve with your hands empty. This emptiness is inner; you cannot fill it with anything that you can get in the world; it cannot be fulfilled unless you get yourself. Hence the insistence of Jesus that, “Even a camel can pass through the eye of a needle, but a man who is rich cannot pass through the gate of heaven.” Why? What is wrong with a rich man?
Nothing is wrong with a rich man. The emphasis is that one who has wasted his life in accumulating things of the world – that is what is meant by a rich man – cannot enter the kingdom of God, because only one who has attained the inner enters there. He cannot deceive at the gate of heaven. He cannot enter because he will be too wasted, rotten, a ruin. He cannot dance at the door, he cannot sing. He cannot enter with a certain significance that he has attained in his life. He is uprooted: he possessed much, but he never possessed himself; and that is the poverty. If you possess yourself you are rich, really rich. If you don’t possess yourself, you may be an emperor but you are poor.
The second thing to be understood is why we go on accumulating things. The truth is so clear, but still we go on. Nobody listens to Jesus or Buddha, and even if you listen, even if you feel that you understand, you never follow it. There must be some very deep reason. So Buddha and Jesus are neglected and you continue on your path. Sometimes a doubt arises, but that is all; again you get settled and you follow your own path. There must be something very deep-rooted which even a Buddha or a Jesus cannot shake, cannot uproot. What is that deep-rootedness?
We exist in the eyes of others: our identity consists of the opinion of others; others’ eyes are the mirrors, we look at our faces in others’ eyes. There is the rub, the problem, because others cannot see your inner being. Your inner being cannot be reflected in any mirror whatsoever. Only your outer can be reflected: reflections are only of the outer, of the physical. Even if you stand before a mirror, the best mirror, only the physical part of you will be reflected. No eye can reflect your inner part.