Please cut my head off.
Mukta, do you think you still have your head? It has been cut long ago. Just the idea has remained. I will take the idea too. I had left it – otherwise people would feel a little disturbed to see you walking without a head. But if you want to enjoy that, it can be done.
This is my whole profession: cutting the head off but still leaving the idea that you have it, so you can move in the world and nobody freaks out.
Oh my beloved beloved, each time you say we need not be grateful to you there is an agony that rips through my heart and it is almost unbearable. The pain I only feel, but do not understand; it feels like it is too much to ask my heart not to be grateful to you, for it knows that without your love it would not have opened to life. I understand a little, when you say to be grateful to existence, and also realize I have forgotten existence many times. You have always been like a window to existence, and all is possible through you. So please, Osho, do not ask this impossible task from my heart, for it suffers too much when you say that we need not to be grateful to you.
Prem Patipada, I do understand your feeling. But I have been telling you this for two reasons: One, I should not be standing in any way between you and existence. Even as a window to existence I give existence a frame which it does not have; it is frameless and formless. If you are looking through the window, the frame of the window becomes the frame of the sky, of existence, which is frameless.
Secondly, it is man’s strange mind – if you feel grateful towards me, somewhere, someday you may take revenge against me. It may not happen to you particularly; but it has happened to many who were as grateful as you are, and now they are as revengeful as they were grateful – in the same proportion.
The mind has a problem: if you are with me, enjoying my presence, enjoying my silence, it is very natural to feel grateful; but one never knows about tomorrow.
Our paths may separate, or you may be able to go only so far with me and then stop. Then you will have to find some rationalization for why you have stopped, or why you have separated from me and moved on another path. You are not in a state of consciousness which can simply say, “It was beautiful to be with him and I am grateful for that, but life takes strange routes; although I am now on a separate path, my gratefulness to him remains the same.” That needs great consciousness.