Individuality is your reality, it is not a show-thing. One can dig as deeply as one wants into you and he will find the same taste. Buddha is reported to have said, “You taste me from anywhere and you will find the same taste, just as you taste the ocean from anywhere and you find it salty.” Individuality is one whole, it is organic. Personality is schizophrenic: the center is something and the circumference is something else, and they never meet, and they are not together. Not only do they never meet, not only are they different, they are diametrically opposed to each other, they are in constant fight.
So the first thing to understand: never adopt a mature attitude. Either be mature or be immature. If you are immature then be immature. By being immature you will be allowing growth. Then let the immaturity be there; don’t be false, don’t be insincere about it. If you are childish, you are childish. So what? Be childish. Accept it, go with it. Don’t create a division in your being, otherwise you are creating the fundamental madness. You just be yourself.
Nothing is wrong with being childish. Because you have been taught that something is wrong in being childish you have started adopting attitudes. From your very childhood you have been trying to be mature, and how can a child be mature? A child is a child; he has to be childish.
But it is not allowed, so small children become diplomats – they start pretending, they start behaving in false ways, they become a lie from their very beginning – and the lie goes on growing. Then one day they start searching for truth; then they have to go into the scriptures, and scriptures contain no truth at all. The truth is contained in your being, that is the real scripture. The Veda, the Koran, the Bible – they are in your consciousness! You are carrying all that is needed by you, it is a gift from existence. Everybody is born with truth in his being; life is truth. But you started learning lies.
Being with me, drop all lies. Be courageous. Of course you will feel a great fear arising in you, because whenever you drop the personality, your childishness, which has never been allowed, will surface. You will feel afraid: “What! Am I going to be childish, at this point? When everybody knows that I am a great professor – or a doctor or an engineer – and I have a PhD degree, am I going to be childish?” The fear arises – the fear of public opinion, of what people will think.
That same fear has destroyed you from the very beginning. The same fear has been the poison: “What will my mother think? What will my father think? What will people think, the teachers and the society?” And the small child starts becoming cunning. He will not show his heart, he knows that will not be accepted by others. So he will create a face, a camouflage. He will show that which people want to see. This is diplomacy, this is being political. This is poison!
Everybody is political. You smile because it pays to smile, you cry because it is expected of you to cry. You say a certain thing because that makes things easy. You say to your wife “I love you” because that keeps her quiet. You say to your husband, “I will die without you, you are the only person in my world, you are my life” – because he expects you to say it, not because you are feeling it. If you are feeling it, then it has beauty, then it is a real rose. If you are simply pretending, massaging his male ego, buttressing him because you have some ends to fulfill through him, then it is an artificial flower, a plastic flower.