The man disciplined himself, stilled his mind, fasted long, tortured himself, and soon became more famous than his master. Angry people, arrogant people, egoistic people can do things which peaceful people will take a little time to do. He became very famous, and thousands of people used to come just to touch his feet.
After twenty years he was in the capital. A man from his village had come for some purpose, and he thought, “It will be good to go and see what transformation has happened to Shantinath. So many stories are heard – that he has become a totally new man, that his old self is gone and a new, fresh being has arisen in him, that he really has become peace, silence, tranquility.”
So the man went with great respect. But when he saw Muni Shantinath, seeing his face, his eyes, he could not think that there had been any change. There was none of the grace which necessarily radiates from a mind which has become silent. Those eyes were still as egoistic – in fact they had become more pointedly egoistic. The man’s presence was even more ugly than it used to be.
Still, the man went close. Shantinath recognized the man, who had been his neighbor – but now it was beneath his dignity to recognize him. The man also saw that Shantinath had recognized him, but he was pretending that he did not. He thought, “That shows much.” He went close by Shantinath and asked, “Can I ask you a question? What is your name?”
Naturally, great anger arose in Shantinath because he knew that this man knew perfectly well what his name was. But still he kept himself in control, and he said, “My name is Muni Shantinath.”
The man said, “It is a beautiful name – but my memory is very short, can you repeat it again? I have forgotten…what name did you say?”
This was too much. Muni Shantinath used to carry a staff. He took the staff in his hand…he forgot everything – twenty years of controlling the mind – and he said, “Ask again and I will show you who I am. Have you forgotten? – I killed my wife, I am the same man.”
Only then did he recognize what had happened…in a single moment of unconsciousness he realized that twenty years have gone down the drain; he has not changed at all. But millions of people feel great silence in him…Yes, he has become very controlled, he keeps himself repressed, and it has paid off. So much respect and he has no qualification for that respect – so much honor, even kings come to touch his feet.
Your so-called saints are nothing but controlled animals. The mind is nothing but a long heritage of all your animal past. You can control it, but the controlled mind is not the awakened mind.