Of course, you cannot be happy. Unless these warring elements within you embrace each other, stop warring, fall in love with each other, or dissolve into each other, there is no possibility of happiness. Then happiness remains just a hope. Happiness is a shadow of harmony, it follows harmony. There is no other was to be happy. Unless you are the harmony, you can strive and strive and you will get more and more frustrated and you will get more and more into misery. Just as a shadow follows you, so happiness follows when you are in a harmonious totality.
The first step happens within you – and when you have become one pulsation with no division, one wave of energy with no antagonizing, with no lower and no higher, with no choice, with no evaluation, with no judgment, when you are simply one, then happens the second step. When you are one you can see the one – only then can the one be seen. The eyes are clear then you have the clarity. When you are one you can immediately see the one around you. Now you know the language of the one. The language of the many has disappeared – that noise is no more, that madhouse is no more, that nightmare is finished. You are silent. In this silence you can immediately dissolve into existence; now you can fall in tune with the pulse of the universe itself. That is the second step of meditation.
The first is difficult, the second is not difficult. The first needs effort, great effort; the second is very simple, comes almost automatically. The first is like a blind man being operated upon so that he can have eyes. The second is after the operation is over: the eyes are there and the blind man opens his eyes and he can see the light and the world of light and the millions of joys around him of color, of light, of beauty, of form.
The first needs effort, the second comes effortlessly. The first is more like yoga, the second is more like Zen – or, to come to a more modern parallel, the first is more like Gurdjieff and the second is more like Krishnamurti. That’s why I say Zen is the pinnacle. Zen is the last word. Yoga is the beginning of the journey, Zen is the end.
When you are one and suddenly you see the oneness outside, all barriers disappear. Then there is no “I” and no “thou,” then there is only God or truth or samadhi or whatsoever word you like – nirvana. Zen people call this state sonomama or konomama – the state of pure isness, suchness, tathata. One simply is. One is not doing anything, one is not thinking anything, one is not feeling anything, one simply is. This isness is the ultimate experience of bliss. Beyond it there is nothing. And this is the goal. To arrive at this isness is the search, the eternal search, of every being.
Before we can understand how to attain to this inner harmony we will have to look deep into how we have become a crowd. How has this calamity fallen upon us? Who has created it? How has it been created? Unless we know how it has been created there is no way to uncreate it.
Once it happened that when Buddha came for his morning sermon he had a handkerchief in his hand. Sitting down before his ten thousand monks he started tying knots in the handkerchief. They were all surprised – he had never done anything like that. What was he doing? Had he forgotten about the sermon? But out of respect they simply kept quiet and went on looking at what he was doing.