When I read your question, I could not believe it. This is the moment to celebrate – feeling empty, feeling silent, all the junk has disappeared from you, feeling pure – you are ready for the guest to come. But because of your hold-back, although the temple is ready, you are not opening its doors; the guest is standing outside.
It is a contradiction to feel empty and melancholy, because emptiness is meditation; and the ultimate in emptiness is enlightenment. This is the most glorious and the most significant experience in man’s life.
And what are you worried about – your organs? If they are melting and disappearing, let them melt and disappear. They are your prison; they are your cage. Once they have disappeared, your soul is free to fly like an eagle across the sun.
Drop this stupid idea of melancholy.
In all this dance and song and celebration, how can you manage to be melancholy? You are doing something impossible. Either your emptiness is false or your melancholy is just an old habit. And that’s what my understanding is, sadness, misery, melancholy – these are your old habits. Although you are dancing, those old habits are also dancing within you. Throw them out!
They are pure poison. They have destroyed millions of people’s lives and they have destroyed your life too. Get rid of them. They are polluting and poisoning your very being.
Just have an experience, a new experience, a new adventure of disappearing completely – wholesale. And you will be surprised – when you disappear completely the whole existence is yours. Right now only bones and blood and skin, these are yours. Not a great treasure…. If you meet your own skeleton, you will run away so fast – “My God, Deva Abhiyana is coming!”
In one of the medical colleges in Bhopal, one of my friends was a doctor, and I used to stay with him. He was very much afraid of ghosts.
I said, “Being a doctor, and that too in a medical college where there are so many dead bodies collected for dissecting, and you are afraid of ghosts!”
He said, “Well, what to do, I am afraid. From my very childhood, I have been afraid.”
So I said, “One thing has to be done. Tonight you get the key of that great hall where you are keeping many dead bodies and we will go there and see – there must be ghosts. So many dead bodies, their ghosts must be around them.”
He said, “I don’t want to go there. I don’t go there even in the day. In the night, never!”
I said, “But I am going; give me the key.”
He said, “But why are you getting into unnecessary trouble?”
I said, “For your sake, because if I am going you will have to come with me; you are my host.”
Very reluctantly, unwillingly, he went with me.