First you create a beautiful man and then you start chasing, then you run after. And after few days living with a beautiful woman or a man, all fantasies fall to the ground. Suddenly you become aware, as if you have been deceived, that this woman looks ordinary. And you were thinking she was a Laila or a Juliet, or you were thinking he is a Majnu or a Romeo, and suddenly, after a few days, the dreams have evaporated and the woman has become ordinary and the man has become ordinary; then you feel disgusted, as if the other has deceived you.
Nobody has deceived and nothing has fallen from the man or woman; it was your own fantasy that has fallen, because fantasies cannot be maintained. You can dream about them but you cannot maintain them for a long time. Fantasies are fantasies! So if you really want to continue in your fantasy, then when you see a woman as beautiful, immediately escape from her as far as you can. Then you will always remember her as the most beautiful woman in the world. Then the fantasy will never come in contact with reality. Then there will be no shattering. You can always sigh and sing and weep and cry for the beautiful woman, but never go near her!
The nearer you come, the more reality, the more objective reality reveals itself. And when there is a clash between objective reality and your fantasy, of course you know which is going to be defeated: your fantasy. Objective reality cannot be defeated. This is the situation.
Tantra says become aware nobody is deceiving you except yourself. The woman was not trying to be very beautiful, she was not creating the fantasy around her, you created it around her; you believed it, and now you are at a loss what to do, because the fantasy cannot be continued against reality. A dream has to break; that is the criterion.
Hindus in the East have made a criterion of truth: they say truth is that which lasts forever, forever and forever; and untruth is that which lasts only for a moment. No other distinction is there. The momentary is the untrue and the everlasting is the truth. And life is everlasting; existence is everlasting. The mind is momentary – so whatsoever mind gives to life remains momentary; it is a color that the mind gives to the life, it is an interpretation. By the time the interpretation is complete, the mind has changed. You cannot maintain the interpretation because mind cannot be maintained for two consecutive moments in the same situation in the same state. Mind goes on changing; mind is a flux. It has already changed – by the time you realize that this man is beautiful, the mind has already changed. Now you will be falling in love with something which is no longer there, not even in your mind.
Tantra says: understand the mechanism of the mind and cut the root. Don’t choose, because when you choose you get identified. Whatsoever you choose you become one with, in a certain way.