And these are the problems: wanting enlightenment too much, and you will miss it; holding the desire anywhere in your unconscious to achieve it, you will not achieve it.
Relaxing, forgetting all about enlightenment, forgetting all about the future, living in the present, your love will attain to a crystal clear purity, undefiled by any desire, even the greatest desire of enlightenment.
Then you will not feel the distinction between the master and yourself; then you can carry the master within your heart. Then wherever you are, your master is with you. The duality is dropped; the two flames have become one. It is not your flame, it is not the master’s flame – when those two flames become one, they become universal. In separation, you are a disciple and there is a master – in becoming one, the disciple disappears, the master disappears; what remains is only a pure awareness.
The transformation of love into pure awareness is the alchemy one has to learn by being close to a master. By being close to a master you can enjoy the warmth, his presence, his words, his heartbeat. But as you go far away you will not be able to listen to the same heartbeat; you will be again yourself – back to zero. You will hear the heartbeat but it will be your own. Close to the master you are overwhelmed.
The secret to learn is to purify your love.
Drop all ambitions.
There is nothing to be achieved.
All that you want is already present in you. The master is not going to give you anything that you don’t have. In fact, the master goes on taking away things which you think you have but you don’t have. And the master cannot give you, of course, that which you have. He can only take away all the barriers, all the hindrances, all the obstacles, so only that which is your own, remains behind. In that unpolluted space, the distinction between the master and the disciple is no more. That does not mean that you don’t feel grateful to the master. In fact, only after this has happened, you feel for the first time a tremendous gratitude.
Sariputta was going very reluctantly on a message tour. Buddha had asked him to go to his own kingdom – he was a prince before he became a disciple. Buddha said, “Now it is your responsibility and your compassion to go to your people – to your father, to your mother, to your whole kingdom. What you have achieved, let them become aware of it. It is their potential too; share it.”
He was very reluctant to leave. Buddha said, “What is the reluctance? – because now I am within you. I am sending you away, knowing perfectly well that you will not feel any distance.”
Sariputta said, “Distance is not the question. I can go to the farthest star, still you will be within my heart. The trouble is, here I touch your feet every day. You may be in my heart, but how am I going to touch your feet?”