I cannot see anybody as a journalist, as a doctor, as an engineer. Those are not your realities, they are just your jobs. When I look at you, I put aside your journalist, I am talking directly to you. Journalism is just your way of earning bread and butter. What importance does it have? I cannot love bread and butter, but I love you as a person, as an individual, and whatsoever I am saying is totally different from what you would have found in the past with the many other people you have interviewed. Even in the future you may not come across a man like me.
My whole interest in this moment is how to help you rejoice the time you have been with me. Your magazine, your writing, does not come between me and you – so when he started introducing the magazine, I was going to stop him, but just out of politeness I listened. What concern do I have with magazines, newspapers?
My concern is purely with the individual, and then it is up to him. Whatsoever he wants to make out of it, he will make out of it. I trust in my love, and I trust in the dignity of the individual that is sitting before me, and the trust will take care of everything. I never think of tomorrow.
But you don’t think that you are responsible for all the sannyasins living here, for the life and the future of the children I have seen in this city?
I am not responsible for anybody. I am not even a member of this commune. I live outside the City of Rajneeshpuram. And I am not a sannyasin, as you can see. It is the commune’s responsibility. I am very irresponsible.
When I was leaving the university, one girl used to love me. But just the way girls are – and particularly in India – she was shy, and I am not the one to chase anybody. I do chasing sitting in my chair… I am just a lazy man. She loved me, and she was continuously sending messages to me. She wanted to get married to me. Then the day of departure came and we were leaving. We had passed our final examinations and then she could not contain it any more.
She pulled me aside and told me, “I have loved you for two years, but I had not the courage to say it. And you are a strange man…. I made so many efforts and so many messages, and you just remained as if I am not here.”
I said, “You do not know: it is just out of compassion that I have remained that way, because I am a very irresponsible man. I may marry you, and tomorrow morning I may forget all about you. I may give birth to children and then I will not bother at all what happens to you and your children.”
Just out of compassion, I kept out of it. It is enough that I am carrying my own responsibility toward myself That’s why I have never accepted any responsibility for anything.