One of the great dancers, Nijinsky, was asked once, “You dance before big audiences – don’t you feel nervous?” He said, “As far as I am concerned, I feel nervous, but only to the point before the dance starts. Once I am in my dance I am absolutely alone, there is nobody else. Not only do others disappear, a moment comes sometimes, and that is the greatest moment, when I myself disappear – only the dance remains.”
This has been observed about Nijinsky, by scientists, that there were some moments when he would jump so high that it was not physically possible, because of gravitation. And more amazing was the part when he would come down: he would come down so slowly – just as if a leaf is falling slowly towards the earth; there is no hurry. That, too, gravitation does not allow: gravitation pulls things forcibly.
He was asked about this and he said, “It is a mystery to me. Whenever I try, it never happens, because I am there. Perhaps I am the weight on which gravity works. When I forget myself completely, suddenly it is there – I am just a watcher as you are a watcher, full of wonder. I don’t know how it happens.”
Perhaps the ego is the heaviest thing in you. In the moment when Nijinsky felt that he himself had disappeared – only the dance was there, the dancer no more – he touched on the same experience as Zarathustra or Gautam Buddha or Lao Tzu, but from a very different dimension. His dance became a mystic experience.
Pause just a moment and listen to me.
“He who seeks may easily get lost himself. It is a crime to go apart and be alone” – thus speaks the herd.
The crowd hates those people who want to be individuals, who want their own way, who want their own style of life. The herd wants you to be just one of them. Your separation reminds them of their inferiority, and it is not surprising that the herd has always been against the individual.
Jesus was not crucified because he was saying anything against Judaism. He was born a Jew, he lived a Jew, he died a Jew, and all that he was saying was contained in the Jewish scriptures. There is not a single thing that can be pointed to as being against Judaism. Why did this young man have to be crucified? What was his crime?
His crime was that he was going alone; he was establishing himself as an individual; he was not following the crowd; he had made his own footpath. He was not on the superhighway with everybody, behaving in the same way, talking about the same things, living the same life.
There is a very clear-cut psychology behind it: All those who suffer from inferiority want to be with people who are the same as they are; then they can forget their inferiority. But anybody who does not suffer from inferiority stands alone, needs no coziness of the crowd, no support of the people, finds himself “enough unto himself” – becomes a dangerous reminder that you are hollow within yourself and you are trying somehow to lose yourself in the crowd.