I said, “At least now drop this whole idea of paralysis. You have proved that you are not paralyzed. It was just an idea in your mind that gripped you, and gripped you so greatly. And for ten years continuously it has become more and more emphasized every day. The imprint has gone deep into your unconscious, but the fire…and you suddenly forgot the whole idea. Now there is no need to fall down again, get up.” And listening to me and seeing that what I was saying was true, hesitantly…but she got up.
I said, “Now never mention paralysis again. It is good that the house is burnt – at least you are saved, you are cured. Now I will see your doctors. They don’t understand a thing about what they are talking about. You have proved all those doctors completely wrong.”
Intelligence needs opportunities, risks, adventures, dangers – then it becomes sharpened. Intelligence goes with the unpredictable because that is risky; intelligence goes with the unclear because there is some work to do to make it clear. Intelligence is almost attracted, as if towards a magnet, to every mysterious situation because there is something to be discovered.
So your conflict is simply between fear and courage. Reduced to the basic realities, choose courage. Never act out of fear and your growth is certain. Act out of fear and you have committed suicide.
You are saying, “I tell myself just to be authentic.” It is not a question of telling yourself to be authentic – be authentic! When you are telling yourself to be authentic it is certain that you are not being authentic; otherwise, what is the need of saying it?
There is a small community who are part of the Christians – a mystic school – called Quakers. They have been harassed, persecuted for a very small thing: they are not willing to take an oath in the court. And their reason is perfectly clear; I am absolutely in agreement with them. Their argument is, “If we take the oath that ‘I will speak only the truth and nothing else,’ it means that without the oath there is a possibility that I may be speaking an untruth. By implication I am accepting that without the oath I am not trustworthy, I may be lying. But it is our religion,” they say, “to be true; hence we cannot take the oath. We always speak the truth. The oath is for those who don’t always speak the truth, not for us.”
They have been jailed, they have been fined, but not a single Quaker has ever taken an oath in any court. And I have great sympathy for them. On many grounds they are very beautiful people. They are the only people in the whole world whose prayer does not consist of words, whose prayer is only silence. They are the only people in whose communions no scripture is read.
They sit silently in darkness and if somebody – there is nobody as a preacher, they are all just sitting – suddenly feels a spontaneous urge to say something, he stands up and he says it. It is not a question of whether he is a preacher or not. It is not a question of whether he is a man of wisdom or knowledge. No, the only valuable thing is his spontaneity.