That is the meaning when I say to you, let your relationship be a mirror. Each relationship has to be a mirror. For the seeker, each relationship has to show something: how you are behaving, what you are -doing. Are you wearing masks continuously? Is there a moment in your life when you drop all masks and you are simply yourself? Is there? If there is not, then there is no moment of love in your life. Even with your beloved you go on playing games. Even with your children you go on playing games.
You say, “I love this woman, I am ready to die for her,” but even with her you are not true, not authentically true, not as you are. Watch.
Love means a relationship when one need not wear any mask. And if you are wearing a mask even with your beloved, your lover, then you don’t know what love is.
And to be with a master certainly means that you will not wear any mask. In the first place it is meaningless because the master can know you as you are behind the mask. His eyes are penetrating. He goes to the very core of your being; he catches you there. He is not concerned with your circumference, he is only concerned with your center.
Sometimes it happens that a person comes with a problem and I don’t answer him, because that is not his problem. He believes that is his problem. I answer some other problem that he has not asked. Sometimes – you must be watching – when I am answering your questions, I turn and change the question in such a way that it becomes the real question, the one that you have not asked. I give you answers which you were not expecting. You feel a little bewildered too; you start thinking maybe I have not understood your question. I have understood it, but I am talking to your core, not to your circumference.
And sometimes I answer A, but my answer is for B, because many times it happens that when I am answering directly to B he will not listen. He protects, he is not available. When I am answering A, B is perfectly there, vulnerable. It is not his problem, I am answering somebody else; he need not defend, he need not have his armor ready, he need not have a shelter. He is sitting there silently; it is none of his concern, so he remains more vulnerable.
And this has been my observation: that listening to others’ questions being answered, you understand more than when your own question is answered, because when your own question is answered you become too tense – this is your question. I may hit you. When I am hitting somebody else, you can enjoy. You can laugh, but you are unaware that in your very laughter, when you open your mouth, I have entered in. In your very laughter, I have reached you, because the moment of laughing is the most vulnerable moment, the most undefended moment.
Before a mirror, each act or absence of act, each word or absence of word, everything is significant, everything relates something about you. How you come to see the master, how you sit before him, how you talk, how you react and respond – each and everything is significant, because these are all languages. You are not aware of these things, but the mirror reflects.