It is not only you who have fallen in love with the same woman; everybody is doing that. In the ordinary, unconscious state of humanity more than that cannot be hoped for. You were fortunate that you got divorced, but it is difficult to live alone unless you know the beauties of being alone.
The moment you are alone you start suffering from loneliness, you start hankering for the company of the other. And then anybody will do, even the same woman that you had divorced; it is better than being lonely. Even if it is miserable, people prefer misery for company rather than loneliness.
Unless you know the joys of meditation you cannot avoid falling in love. Once you start enjoying your own being, the joy, the space, the absolute freedom, the unhindered consciousness, nobody occupying your attention, nobody trying to catch your attention, nobody impinging on your freedom, interfering with your freedom…. When you start enjoying your aloneness you have become a meditator. Yes, love will also be possible after that, but a totally different kind of love.
You must have been suffering from loneliness and, finding the same woman again, you may have thought it is better to be with her than to be lonely. And you must have forgotten all the miseries – people’s memories are very short.
And this has to be understood: the mind tends to forget the miserable part, it tends to remember the pleasurable part. That is one of the strategies of the mind to remain in control, to remain your master. It always tends to forget the misery; it goes on magnifying, enhancing, decorating the pleasurable part. Reality is totally different, but the mind lives in imagination.
And your memories are not reliable at all because your memories are fictitious. You just think how beautiful it was, you have forgotten all the misery; you have chosen only a few moments that may have been beautiful. There must have been a few moments which were beautiful, but only a few moments, few and far between. And they cannot be as beautiful as you were thinking; otherwise what was the need to divorce the woman? The misery must have been much more, the pain must have been too much, unbearable. You must have suffered too much, the woman must have suffered too much. It is not a question of the woman being at fault or you being at fault; it is simply that two unconscious people being together are bound to create misery for each other.
If you cannot be happy alone, how can you create happiness for anybody else? You yourself are not happy, how can you give happiness to the other? You can give only that which you have. You are miserable – you can pretend that you are not miserable, but for how long? The honeymoon cannot last forever. Within a week or at the most two weeks it is finished, and then you know that both are miserable people. And when two miserable people live together, misery is not only doubled, remember, it is multiplied.