Yes, my consciousness, my awareness. But that you cannot find in the books, that you can find only in yourself.
I am absolutely alert. Whatsoever I am saying, I am not saying according to some dogma, according to my own philosophy up to this moment. No, I am simply responding to this moment – to you. And I don’t care about anything else for the moment. I am a man who lives moment to moment. And whatsoever happens in the moment, I am available to it.
Am I wrong when I try to describe the nucleus in your vision as celebrating life?
No, that is just a by-product. The nucleus is consciousness, absolute consciousness. Out of it, many things will be there: celebration of life, love, laughter. Out of it, so many branches and so many flowers. But the nucleus remains consciousness. And that I have never contradicted in my whole life. I cannot, because whatsoever I have said, I have said with full consciousness. But that was in that moment.
For example, I may fall in love with a woman, and in that moment I may say to the woman that I will love her forever. And I am not cheating, I am not deceiving; that’s my response in that moment, and I am absolutely clear about it. But that does not mean that tomorrow I will not change. I am not saying that I will never change; I am simply stating my response to the moment. The next moment nobody knows what will happen, and the next moment I will not find myself chained by my own past.
So my approach is to go on dying to the past moment continuously so that you can be alive in the new moment that is coming. Death to the past, life to the present. And the future is going to come to you as present, never as past.
That means, I think, try to live without tradition.
This idea that you described – of living out of the fullness of your consciousness, and in this moment, here and now – is this idea not also a product of tradition?
No, because nobody has said it before. No tradition exists around this idea. Buddha was very consistent: in forty-two years’ teaching you cannot find a single contradiction. In Mohammed you cannot find any contradiction, in Jesus you cannot find any contradiction either. These people lived according to a certain dogma. They were prisoners.