The moment you create a relationship you are entering into a contract, a business deal. Love disappears, it becomes law. Now you are not very far away from the divorce court. Unless you are a person who loves to be dominated, who likes to be henpecked – then you have got a perfect woman. Then don’t make any fuss, simply surrender, declare, “I am a henpecked husband. I am your poor servant; you are my master. You order and I will follow.”
Actually that is what is happening all over the world but nobody says it. There are many things which are not asserted in the society.
A small child was asked by the teacher, “Can you name an animal which changes color?”
The small boy stood up and said, “What colors do you mean? I have not only known, but I live with such an animal who even changes his whole being.”
Even the teacher could not understand. She said, “What is that animal?”
He said, “He is my dad. When he goes out he is a lion – just look at his chest and his mustache – and when he comes back to the house he is just a rat!”
It has a long history which persists in humanity’s unconscious. The man is always afraid of a few things. Somebody may disturb their relationship, he wants to make a prison cell for his wife, but it doesn’t matter. Even in that prison there are people: the chauffeur…You cannot make it a hundred percent foolproof, because then even you cannot enter into it.
The fear, the jealousy that your object of love – and remember when I use the word object, I use it very emphatically. Man has treated woman as a sexual object, not as a human, an equal spiritual being – just a commodity!
For thousands of years women were sold in the marketplace, auctioned. And even today – although the form has changed the reality remains the same – you prevent your wife from having any kind of friendship with any other man. It is an ugly way. In this vast universe you are not alone. There are so many unique people and your wife is just a human being and it is a human frailty that sometimes she may see somebody and a great love may arise in her.
It may be casual, but your fear is very strange, it arises out of your financial mind, your greed. You are afraid – your son has to be your son; the empire that you are creating should not go into the hands of somebody else. You will die one day – your son should receive as a heritage your desires, your ambitions, your riches. All that you have achieved and all that you wanted to achieve, your son has to fulfill it.
Your son is a projection of yourself. In a certain way it is true. Your son is nothing but a miniature cell of your being. You will die, but you will live in your children, they will be your blood and your bones. The fear is that if the wife is allowed freedom then it will be very difficult to know whether your son is actually yours or somebody else’s.