What does Tantra propose about it, what has to be done then? Tantra says: There is no way to be satisfied with the outer; you will have to move inwards. You will have to find your inner woman and inner man, you will have to attain to a sexual intercourse inside. That is a great contribution.
How can it happen? Try to understand this map. I talked about seven chakras, the Yoga-Tantra physiology. In man the muladhar is male and swadhishthan, female. In woman the muladhar is female and swadhishthan, male, and so on and so forth. In seven chakras, up to the sixth, the duality remains; the seventh is nondual.
There are three pairs inside you: muladhar-swadhishthan have to get married. Manipura-anahata have to get married. Vishuddha-agya have to get married.
When the energy moves outside, you need a woman outside. You have a little glimpse for a moment, because the coition with a woman outside cannot be permanent, it can be only momentary. For a single moment you can lose yourself in each other. Again you are thrown back to yourself, and thrown back with a vengeance. That’s why after each love-making there is a certain frustration: you have failed again, it didn’t happen the way you wanted it to happen. Yes, you reached to a peak, but before you had even become aware of it the decline, the fall began. Before the peak was achieved, the valley. Before you had met the woman or the man…and the separation. The divorce comes with marriage so fast that it is frustrating. All lovers are frustrated people: they hope much, they hope against their experience, they hope again and again – but nothing can be done. You cannot destroy the laws of reality. You have to understand those laws.
The outer meeting can only be momentary, but the inner meeting can become eternal. And the higher you move the more eternal it can become. The first, muladhar, in man is male. Even while making love to a woman outside, Tantra says, remember the inner. Make love to the woman outside, but remember the inner. Let your consciousness move inwards. Forget the outer woman completely. In the moment of orgasm forget the woman or the man completely. Close your eyes and be in, and let it be a meditation. When energy is stirred, don’t miss this opportunity. That is the moment when you can have a contact – an inward journey.
Ordinarily it is difficult to look in, but in a love-moment, some gap, you are not ordinary. In a love-moment you are at your maximum. When orgasm happens your whole body energy is throbbing with dance; each cell, each fiber dancing in a rhythm, in a harmony that you don’t know in ordinary life. This is the moment, this moment of harmony; use it as a passage inwards. While making love, become meditative, look in.
A door opens at that moment – this is the Tantra experience. A door opens in that moment, and Tantra says that you feel happy only because that door opens and something of your inner bliss flows to you. It is not coming from the outer woman, it is not coming from the outer man; it is coming from your innermost core. The outer is just an excuse.