How can your friends believe it, that it has happened to you and it has not happened to them? It is so much against their egos that you have found and they have not found yet, and still they are struggling. No, the easier way for them is to deny, to say that you have not found, that you are in an illusion, that you have been hypnotized, that you are hallucinating, that you have been drugged. That gives them a consolation, that gives them a kind of at-easeness. If you have really found, then they will feel very, very uneasy – then their lives are failures.
It has been a beautiful experience. I know you could not be very playful. It was difficult. Next time when I send you, you will be more playful. Now don’t get afraid! I know that you don’t want to go back again. Enough is enough. But one more time… Next time the whole project is to be playful. Then people will laugh more and they will think that you have gone even madder. But laugh, dance, sing… This time you were arguing. Next time no arguing – singing, dancing, hugging people.
But I am absolutely happy. Whatsoever has happened has been good objectively, has been good for others, has been good for you. It is a device: to send you for a particular purpose is a device for your inner growth. And you have been successful. There was every possibility of being a failure.
I am reminded…
Once, George Gurdjieff asked P.D. Ouspensky, his chief disciple of those days, to come from London to a faraway place somewhere in the Caucasus. It was very difficult. Financially Ouspensky was bankrupt. He had no money, no house to live in, nobody to support him. And such a long journey! And the times were very dangerous. In those parts of the world it was dangerous to move, because the Russian revolution was happening. People were being massacred, killed, murdered. There was no peace. Even Gurdjieff had to leave Russia, and he was hiding in the mountains of the Caucasus.
It was not the right time to go there; it was very dangerous. The journey was not easy: all the trains were unsettled, roads were cut, bridges were broken. It was chaos. But when the master calls, the disciple has to follow. Whatever belongings he had, he sold. He borrowed money from people, and traveled thousands of miles. It took him almost thirty days to reach Gurdjieff. Tired, tattered, thinking many times, “What am I doing? People are escaping from Russia, and I am going there!” And he was on the blacklist of the Communists, because he was a well-known figure – chief disciple of George Gurdjieff, a well-known, world-famous mathematician, a great author, one of the greatest the world has ever known. His books were translated into almost all the languages of the world. Going back to Russia was dangerous. He could be caught, imprisoned, killed. He was anti-Communist! – no sensible person can be a Communist, because the whole idea is nonsense. But he traveled… And when he reached Gurdjieff, Gurdjieff looked at him and the first thing that he said was, “Go back to London and start work again.”
Now that was too much. Ouspensky failed. He could not trust this man. Now what kind of a joke is this? Playing with somebody’s life in such a way… And Gurdjieff immediately said, “Go back right now! I have nothing else to say.”