If you are really a practicing Catholic you will not hesitate even for a single moment in becoming a sannyasin. Because you are hesitating, let me say to you: you are not a practicing Catholic. And what do you mean by “practicing Catholic”? Because you go to church every Sunday? Because you say the Lord’s Prayer every night? Because you read the Bible every day for a certain period of time? What do you mean by being a practicing Catholic? Then why are you here? For what? If you have found the answer, you need not be here. If you have not found the answer, remember, you have still to inquire, still to journey…
I am offering my hand and you say, “How can I hold two masters’ hands?” Do you think you are holding Christ’s hand? Look again! Your hands are empty. If you cannot hold the hand of a living master, how can you hold the hand of a master gone for two thousand years? You cannot even be certain whether he ever existed or not. There are people who think that it is only a story, that there has never been an historical person like Christ. There are people, great scholars, who think that this is only an ancient folk drama, this whole story of Jesus has never been a reality.
How are you going to drop these doubts? And if you look into the story, it will create a thousand and one doubts in you. Jesus walking on water – can you really believe it? And when I say “really” I mean really. Can you really believe somebody walking on water? Can you really believe Jesus touching blind people’s eyes and giving them sight? Can you really believe Jesus bringing Lazarus back to life from death? Do you believe Jesus is born out of a virgin mother? Is it possible? Do you believe that Jesus came back from death after three days, resurrected?
Look deep down: you will have a thousand and one doubts. In fact, it is so difficult to believe even a living master, how to believe in a dead master? And around dead masters stories are bound to be created by the disciples, out of their foolishness. They think that by creating these stories they will help the message to spread. And for a time being it may be so – there were days when Jesus became important only because he was born out of a virgin mother. Buddha was not born out of a virgin mother, Mahavira was not born out of a virgin mother, Krishna was not born… So it was something rare, unique; nobody else could claim it, it impressed people. But as people became more and more educated, as intelligence grew, as people became thinkers more and more, the same thing became the problem. Now one hesitates even to mention it.
Resurrection helped Christianity to spread all over the world, because Jesus was the only one who came back from death: of course, he has firsthand knowledge about what happens after death. Buddha, Mahavira, they are alive and talking about death and beyond, but they don’t have any authentic experience. Jesus has. This helped Christianity to spread all over the world. But now the same thing has become a disadvantage. Now to talk about resurrection is to be laughed at.
What do you mean that you are a practicing Catholic? If you were really a practicing Catholic, there are only two alternatives: you either would not have been here, there would have been no need; or, if you had felt the presence of christ-consciousness here, then there would have been no hesitation on your part in becoming a sannyasin. That will be really be becoming a Catholic, that will be becoming a christ.