The first question:
There is no more searching and seeking. That has all stopped. I have found nothing in particular, but I feel free, freed. I go about my business without anxiety. This for me is bliss, and I feel such a flood of gratitude for your presence here.
There is nothing to be found in particular. The search for the particular is illusory, utterly illusory. The mind seeks something in particular; that is the problem with the mind. God is not a particular thing or a particular being; God is sheer existence.
All that is, is God. God is the greatest generality. You cannot find him somewhere because he is everywhere. You cannot find him in any place because he is the whole, the total. You cannot indicate him; whatsoever the indication, it will be wrong: He is in all directions, within and without. Mind is narrow; it goes on seeking in a very concentrated way. Concentration is not the approach towards God. Concentration is a mind approach. God is everywhere, so you have to relax, you have to be meditative. That’s the difference between concentration and meditation. Concentration is a focusing of the mind exclusively on something. That’s what desire is: a concentrated mind, a mind intent to reach somewhere, to reach something, a great seeking – but it has to be narrow. And God is the infinite.
You have to relax, and you have to drop all searching – only then you’ll find him. Seek, and you will never find him. Just be, and he has always been there, surrounding you – he has never left you for a single moment, because you cannot exist without him. It is impossible to be without him for a single split moment. He is your life. He is your being. You can exist without food for months, you can exist without water for a few days, you can exist without air for a few seconds, but you cannot exist without God even for a split second. It is impossible.
This is my whole effort here: to help you to relax. I am not here to make you tense, ambitious, desiring to find God. One who is searching is still in the world. The searcher is a part of the world. One day he was seeking money, power, prestige; now he is seeking God, bliss, heaven – but the search continues. He has only changed the objects of the search, but he remains the same.
I am here to help you to see the point that God is already the case. You are just like a fish already in the ocean. Maybe the ocean is so obvious that you can’t see it: you are born in it, you are made of it, you will dissolve in it. It is a question of recognition, not of search. A searching mind becomes concentrated. Relax and just recognize.