But deep down you are also feeling happy that he is coming, and the same will be his situation. Let him come. He’s just your old boyfriend: you know him every bit, he knows you every bit. All the fights are well known, all the problems are well known. There is no need to feel nervous because there is not going to be anything new. It is just the old chap, so let him come and start life again in the same old way.
It is something to be understood: the girlfriend you get or the boyfriend you get, you deserve. You don’t get any boyfriend who you don’t deserve and you don’t get any girlfriend who you don’t deserve – those kinds of relationships last for one day or two days. But your relationship has a history and it is going to last to the very end, so relax and take it easily!
You deserve him, he deserves you. And once you see the point that you deserve each other there is no question of any grudge, any complaining, any grumbling. You are strong enough, because that crackpot has not been able to make even a dent in you. He has been doing all kinds of neurotic things. But he does not know that Latifa is a psychotic, and neurotics and psychotics make good marriages. They fit perfectly.
One psychoanalyst was asked – because those two words look so similar, and the difference is known only to the experts – the psychoanalyst was asked, “What is the difference between neurosis and psychotics?”
“He said, “The neurotic thinks two plus two are five and, whatever you do, he never changes his mind. He’s determined and committed to his viewpoint. The psychotic knows that two plus two are four but feels very nervous – why are they four?”
Perfect marriages happen only in heaven, but once in a while on the earth too. Latifa and her boyfriend are a perfect combination. So let the poor fellow come, start hammering the old way…. You are accustomed and well trained, he is accustomed and well trained. One feels worried about a new girlfriend; one never knows what she is going to do – freak out in the middle of the night? One is nervous about the new boyfriend, because one cannot predict what kind of man he’s going to prove to be.
You are certain. In this certainty you should relax and let him come. He will bring his own question. I have been throwing out his questions, but because I have answered yours, now I will have to answer his question about you.
But I don’t see that there is any problem. You are both perfectly happy in your misery; all people are perfectly happy in their miserable relationships! That’s why after a five weeks’ separation you feel good. But a longer separation and you will start missing him.
I have given him an exact time so that you can enjoy freedom and he can enjoy freedom; and in the right time, when you start missing each other, he’s back. Just wait! And he’s not a dangerous person; he cannot harm you. He’s very good at heart – just a little loose in his head. But to have a boyfriend who is a little loose in the head is better than to have a boyfriend who is a little tight in the head. I know it is no ordinary relationship: you both are extraordinary.