If you feel that you have to cathart, then close the room and cathart on a pillow. Why destroy a relationship for it? Everyone is seeking his own happiness and there is nothing wrong in it. That’s the only way to seek happiness. If you are together, help each other. If you feel it is harmful, separate. But remember, it is not only with this relationship; it is always going to be so. So face it, talk to him.
One should learn from every experience. Nothing is bad because everything can become a learning.
Osho speaks to eight people who are about to offer a three-day course in the Arica program.
There are just two or three things I would like to say before you start your work.
One is: bring more love into it. The techniques are beautiful, but love is lacking. Whenever you just become technique oriented, then by and by you forget that love is the greatest technique. All else is secondary – can be helpful, but cannot replace love.
So don’t be just technical, otherwise you will help a little but not enough, and you will not be able to help to the very end. Sooner or later a technique comes to an end, but love never does. Each technique should become a vehicle of love, so that when the technique ends, love takes over. And one never comes to the point where one can say that now the journey is finished and there is nothing left.
When you work on people, don’t work on them as if they are means. Each individual is an end. The technique exists for the individual – the sabbath is for man, not man for the sabbath. Always remember this, because the mind tends to forget. It is very technical and does not believe in love.
So help people, but remain alert to give them as much care and love as possible. You will see that the same methods used in the West – which work up to a certain limit and then stop – don’t stop anywhere; they go on and on. So make it a very loving process. You follow me?
And the second thing: always start in silence and always end with silence. In the beginning it is asking for help from existence. In the end it is a thank you. Always ask for the help of existence, because man is helpless; and if you remember this, you will never condemn one who fails. Whenever you work with techniques, the fallacy is possible that you start thinking that man is enough. You forget existence, you forget the whole.