A few minutes later little Muni is woken again. But this time it is a male voice joining in chorus, yelping and roaring, followed by deep silence.
“Mom! Mom! Call the doctor!” cries Muni.
“What is it?” asks Mrs. Bramachappati.
“Well,” says Muni, “that poor German girl’s fever has just infected that nice American man from downstairs!”
Kowalski goes to stay in a big hotel in Los Angeles for the first time.
“I am not going to have this room,” Kowalski complains to the bellboy. “It is so small I can hardly move in it. It is no better than a pigsty, and I am not going to sleep on that tiny folding bed. Just because I am a Polack, don’t think you can fool me!”
“Please get in, sir,” says the bellboy. “This is the elevator!”
Pope the Polack is picked up outside the Vatican on suspicion of rape. He is taken to the police station, fingerprinted, booked, and locked in a cell.
A few hours later, he is placed in a line with five other men. He looks around him with some curiosity. There are several cops, some men in plain clothes and the rape victim. Seeing her, he leaps out of the line and pointing excitedly shouts, “That is her! That is her!”
Mike, the barman at the Dublin Hotel, is thoroughly fed up with Paddy. Every night, Paddy comes in five minutes before closing time, orders three beers and proceeds to drink them very slowly, forcing Mike to stay late. So Mike has an idea. He has heard about Kowalski working as a gorilla, so he goes and asks him to come to the pub that night.
Kowalski waits in the back room in his gorilla suit, and when Mike has served Paddy his three beers, he goes and tells Kowalski to bang his chest, scream and make as much noise as possible. Hearing such frightening noises from the back room the whole pub clears out immediately, except Paddy, who continues sipping his beer.
Then Mike says, “Go out there and really scare him!”
So Kowalski bursts through the door, roaring, banging his chest and jumping up and down. But still Paddy sips his beer. Then Mike shouts, “Get him, gorilla!”
Kowalski leaps over the bar and jumps on Paddy and they roll out of the door, wrestling. Mike can hear a terrible noise of fighting outside, but when it is over, to Mike’s horror, Paddy walks in. He is covered in blood and hair, and dusting himself off, sits down and says, “My God! Give a Polack a fur coat and he thinks he owns the place!”