But now those few sannyasins, just a dozen, are in a dilemma. They cannot fit with the society They could not fit in the society, that’s why they had come here. Now it is even more difficult for them to fit with the society, so they are in a limbo. They cannot fit with the society, and the milieu where they were acceptable as they were – nobody was trying to change them – they have left.
In Santa Fe those twelve are known as “the dirty dozen.” Now they are hankering to come back. They are writing letters to sannyasins that they are dreaming of the commune, they are missing the commune. But they don’t have guts enough to say, “We would like to come back.”
Writing these letters they are trying – perhaps we will invite them back. We never prevented them from going, that would have been an infringement on their freedom. We will not invite them, for the same reason. Just as out of freedom they have gone, out of freedom they can come.
And everybody is welcome. We don’t bother about the past, we have not inquired about the past of anyone. Our concern is to drop the past and to be in the present, and be available and open for the unknown future.
Now it is their past – that they have once been sannyasins, then they left it. They can come back as clean, pure…they can drop their past. Nobody is even going to ask them, “Why had you left, and why are you coming back?”
When they left, they left in the darkness of the night, ashamed, because they had no real reasons to leave. The only reason for their leaving was their ego. Certainly in this commune nobody can nourish his ego.
And to be a misfit does not mean to be an egoist. If you are an egoist, sooner or later you will compromise. When you find any group of people, any society, any country, which helps you to be more egoistic, you will immediately fit with that society.
The real misfit is a humble man.
That’s why nobody can absorb him.
He is free because he is free of the ego.
Now these “dirty dozen”…. And Santa Fe seems to be something special. Nobody had heard about it before. Why have these camels reached Santa Fe? Just because they are camels. Santa Fe at its entrance has a rock formation of a camel. They print postcards of that camel – somebody sent me one. Then I came to know why these camels are going to Santa Fe – Santa Fe is meant for camels.
But they don’t know…now that they have been with me for four years, five years, seven years, they cannot fit even with camels! So much has happened in those five years without their knowing. They have lost their humps! Now the other camels are not going to accept them; they are unfit camels there. And their letters show that they are waiting to receive the message to come.
I have never called anybody, but I have never prevented anybody. It is your freedom to be here or not to be here. If you are feeling in difficulty…you are enriched in your understanding that this is the only place where you can be accepted with respect, without anybody cutting you, tailoring you, making you into a certain shape, giving you a mold.