So what to do? Suppress the anger, do not be angry, pull yourself in, close yourself. Fight with your anger and suppress it. But then you will be sitting on something which will explode any moment. You are sitting on a Vesuvius – any moment it will explode.
You go on collecting. The whole day’s anger is collected; the whole month’s anger is collected; the whole year’s anger, and the anger of your whole life, and then the anger of many lives, is collected. It is there; it can explode at any moment. Then you become very afraid of being alive even, because any moment anything can go in and you will explode. You become afraid, every moment is an inner struggle.
Psychologists say it is better to express than to suppress, but religion cannot say this. Religion says both are stupid. In expression you are harming the other and also yourself. In suppression you are harming yourself, and you will harm someone else someday. Move to the source so that the energy falls back to the source and becomes formless. Then you will feel very powerful without being angry. Then you will feel energy – vital energy. You will be alive, you will have an intense life without forms. Anyone will be impressed just by your presence. You need not dominate anyone, just your presence and they will feel that some powerful source has come.
Whenever someone goes to a Buddha or to a Krishna, suddenly his energy feels a change of climate because of such a powerful source. The moment you move near, you are magnetized. No one is magnetizing you, no one is trying anything, there is just the presence. You may feel that someone has hypnotized you, but no one is hypnotizing. The presence of a buddha – whose energy has become formless, whose energy has gone to the source, who is centered at his source – the very presence is hypnotizing. It becomes charismatic.
Buddha became enlightened. Before his enlightenment he had five disciples. They were ascetics and when Buddha himself was a great ascetic, torturing his body in many, many ways, inventing new and more sadistic techniques to torture himself, those five were his ardent followers. Then Buddha felt that this was wholly, absolutely absurd. Just by torturing one’s body one is not going to realize oneself. When he realized this, he left ascetic ways. Those five followers left him immediately. They said, “You have fallen down. You are no more an ascetic.” They left him.
When Buddha became enlightened, the first idea that came to his mind was about those five followers. Once they were his followers, so he must go to them. He felt a duty – he must find them and tell them what he has found. So he searched for them, and he traveled in Bihar, from Bodhgaya to Benares, just to find them. They were at Sarnath. Buddha never came back to Benares again, never came back to Sarnath again, because he came only for those five disciples.