So each hot love turns into hot hate. But you are accustomed to hot – either friendship or enmity, but it has to be hot. You are so insensitive that unless something is very hot you cannot feel it. Hence, your question.
My love is cool.
To understand it, you will have come to the same temperature.
And cool love is not only love, it is much more. Because of its coolness, it is meditation, it is silence, it is serenity, it is tranquillity, it is centering. It is not a small phenomenon.
I love you more than you can ever be loved.
But my love and your experience of love are so different that you will have to change gear. This is what happened while you were waiting. You waited one day, two days, three days…. And I was sending messages: “Within one or two days I will be starting….” You know I am crazy, I have my own ways of working.
I would not have started speaking. It is because of Darshan, Bhadra and Hansa. I was not seeing people for the simple reason that I find it impossible to say no to anything. And when Hansa recited a small piece of Urdu poetry, which means “I don’t have any complaint. As it is, I am happy; I don’t have any complaint. But life without you is not life at all….”
It was impossible to say no.
So I said to them, “Inform my people that I will start speaking today. Rather than saying no to you, I can stop again!” I have my ways – and this time I will not allow Bhadra, Hansa and Darshan to see me!
But this is significant to understand: whether I am speaking or not speaking, whether I am seeing you or not seeing you, if you can be here feeling the invisible presence, that is more than can be expected of human beings. And that is the golden key.
And in what situation you will wake up nobody knows. Everybody is asleep for different reasons and needs different situations to wake up.
Perhaps it helped Purna greatly. She was waiting one day, the next day…. Naturally when you have to wait too long, waiting becomes not an excitement but a settled state. She settled with waiting. She forgot even what she was waiting for. This is the moment when energy starts turning inwards. And to shower in your own energy is the greatest ecstatic experience available to man.
But the second part of her question…she will have to learn a little more, to experience a little more about love – object-less love; love not as a relationship but as a state of being. Then she will be surprised: it is cool, not hot. It is non-possessive, it is non-jealous, it has no conscious or unconscious desire to dominate the other.
True love is not a beggar; it does not ask you to “love me.”