If you can love a woman spontaneously…. In fact, Tao will say that Tantra has a wrong attitude, because you have to prepare. Preparation means that you are preparing for the future. Tao knows only one time – which is now; and only one place – which is here. Now is the only time and here is the only place. Here is heaven and now is nirvana. So don’t prepare.
If in some moment love flows, love takes possession of you, go with it. Don’t push the river. Don’t try to give it any shape. Don’t try to fix it into any ritual. Just go with it. In deep trust, in deep gratitude, go with it. While making love to a woman don’t try to prove anything – as they are trying to do in the West. Don’t try to prove anything – because when you start trying to prove, your mind has come in. While you are making love to a woman forget all about the fact that you are a man and she is a woman. Let boundaries merge and mix. Don’t remain a man otherwise you will miss – because again a dualism comes in: you are the man and she is the woman. Nobody knows why two persons really make love. Many times it happens that the man becomes the woman and the woman becomes the man. Who bothers who is who?
And if you are thinking about it then the mind is there and the mind is the barrier; it does not allow the unison to happen totally. So Tao simply says: go spontaneously, with no ritual, with no idea to prove. And remember, never use sexuality for anything. Tantra uses it as a step towards samadhi. Tao says: never use anything as a means. Everything is an end unto itself. The moment you start thinking of somewhere to go, something to reach, some result to attain out of it, you are not total, your mind is divided, you are already in the future. There are no means and no ends. Everything simply is an intrinsically beautiful end unto itself.
In Tao this is very basic. Love, eat, go for a morning walk, swim in the river, sit in the sun, watch the stars – but let everything be simple, not for anything else. Sing a song, but not for any result. Look at this tree, but not for any result. Go for a morning walk, but not for health! Don’t be a naturopath! Just go for a walk, it is beautiful. Health is a by-product; you need not worry about it, it happens. Lie down in the sun, enjoy it, but not for anything else. Lie there for its own sake. That is what Tao is.
And in that relaxed attitude life starts pouring into you from everywhere. All doors open, all windows open. Existence flows into you, you flow into existence.
Tao is very simple; therefore, because we are very complex, it is very difficult. Simple things don’t appeal to us. Tantra appeals to many people but Tao has not that much appeal. Tao appeals very rarely. If Tao appeals to you, consider yourself to be fortunate. The very possibility of your getting interested in Tao is a great blessing.
When you translate everything in terms of Tao it becomes spontaneity.
The second question: