I have been working the whole night because of a small remark I made which may have been hurtful to Devaraj. He may not have noticed it, but it has been sitting heavy on me all night. I could not sleep. I had said, “No buddha has ever had a personal dentist, but Gautam the Buddha had a personal physician.” That was not quite right so I consulted the records, the Akashic records.
I will have to say a few more things, which nobody cares about, particularly the foolish historians. I was not consulting history. I had to go in what H.G. Wells called The Time Machine, back into time. It is the hardest work, and you know I am a lazy man. I am still huffing and puffing.
Buddha’s physician, Jeevaka, was given to Buddha by a king, Bimbasara. Another thing is that Bimbasara was not one of Buddha’s sannyasins. He was just a sympathizer. Why did he give Jeevaka to Buddha? – Jeevaka was Bimbasara’s own personal physician, the most famous of those days – because he was competing with another king whose name was Prasenjita. Prasenjita had offered Buddha his own physician. He had just mentioned that, “Whenever you have need, my personal physician will be at your service.”
This was too much for Bimbasara. If Prasenjita could do it then Bimbasara would show him that he could offer his most cherished physician to Buddha as a gift. So although Jeevaka followed Buddha wherever he went, he was not a follower, remember. He remained Hindu, a brahmin.
That was strange – a physician to Buddha, continuously with him, even in his most intimate moments, and still a brahmin? That shows the truth. Jeevaka was still on salary from the king. He was in the service of the king. If the king wanted him to be with Buddha, okay, a servant has to follow the order of his master. Even so he was very rarely with Buddha because Bimbasara was old, and again and again he needed his doctor, so he called him back to the capital.
Devaraj, you may not have thought about it, but I felt sad that I had been a little cruel. I should not have said that. You are as unique as one can be. As far as having been a physician to a buddha is concerned, nobody can be compared to you…either in the past or in the future, because there is never going to be a man so simple, so insane that he calls himself Zorba the Buddha.
That reminds me of the story I was telling you. A great burden has been lifted from my heart. You can even see it in my breathing. I am really relieved. It was just a simple remark, but I am so sensitive, perhaps more than a buddha is supposed to be. But what can I do? I cannot be a buddha according to anybody else; I can only be myself. I am relieved of a great burden that you may not have felt at all, or perhaps deep down you were aware of it and you giggled just to hide it. You cannot hide anything from me.