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Men-Women - The Psychology of Frustration

"Boredom is perhaps the most significant phenomenon that has happened to the twentieth century. Man was never so bored before. In the ancient days, when man was a hunter and there was no marriage and no possibility of monotony, he was not bored, there was no time to be bored. The woman was not bored; there were possibilities of choosing new men. Marriage settled everything in the name of safety and security, but it took away exploration." Osho

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"Just start! Whatever you are doing here... you are listening here, just listen. There is no need to verbalize it. The mind is a commentator – it goes on commenting – but if you try intensely to hear, the commentating mind will stop because it is a question of energy. You have a certain energy. If you stake the whole energy in listening, then this continuous commentary in the mind automatically stops. It has no more energy; you are not nourishing it."

Osho, Beyond Psychology, #33

Men-Women - The Psychology of Frustration
Excerpted from: Satyam, Shivam, Sundaram, #1

I was reading an article about women being fed up and the responsibility is from men. Is it true?

"It is true... but only half true. Man is also fed up, and the responsibility is of the women. In fact we are all in the same boat man or woman, they are all fed up because our way of life is utterly wrong. Neither are men responsible for women's boredom nor are women responsible for men's frustration.

"You will have to go deep into the psychology of frustration. The first thing to remember is that you are frustrated, you are fed up, you are bored only if you were expecting otherwise. If you were not expecting anything...

"I am not fed up, and I don't see any possibility... To the very last breath I will remain with the same wondering eyes I was born with. I am also living in the same world in which you are living. I am not bored, because I never expected anything. Hence frustration is impossible.

"Women are fed up because they have been expecting too much from man, and the poor man cannot fulfill all that. Women are more imaginative; they make a hero out of any Tom, Dick, Harry. With their romantic eyes idiots appear to be Gautam the Buddhas.

"And slowly, slowly as they come closer to their great heroes, they don't find the giants, they find ordinary poor human beings. Then great frustration sets in. They magnify it and exaggerate it but you cannot live in exaggerations and you cannot go on living looking through a magnifying glass. Sooner or later you have to come to terms with reality.

"The reality is just the henpecked husband, and utterly uninteresting. And the man he is not so imaginative but his biological instinct makes him almost intoxicated, and when he is intoxicated by his biological instinct then any ugly woman appears like a Cleopatra. His eyes are covered with biological madness.

"The people who called love blind were not wrong. The man starts seeing with closed eyes; he is afraid to open his eyes because the reality may not be so great. But how long can you go on living with closed eyes? Sooner or later you have to see the woman you have been infatuated with.

"The biological infatuation disappears very soon; it is chemical, hormonal. Once you are sexually satisfied with the woman, all blindness, all madness disappears. You are again rational, sane, and you see just an ordinary woman. Naturally, to avoid her you start reading the newspaper; men are sitting before their TV's. In America they have done a survey: the average American man looks at the TV seven and a half hours per day. And naturally the woman feels fed up." Osho


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